Mario and how things work.

I was playing Super Mario Galaxy today (a video game for the Nintendo Wii, for anyone born before 1960, and the place you were born was under a rock). As I maneuvered Mario around avoiding nefarious characters out to get me, I realized that Mario really knows his stuff. If something bad is coming at you you: A. Jump out of the way, or B. spin around crazily and hope that it knocks it out of your way. This is a simple lesson so many people just don't get. Fight or flight. Each has its place and time, and each can be very wrong. But all and all one of the two is the best way to win at life's hard lessons. When bad things are a-comin' get out of the way. When the shit is going to hit the fan, step to the side of the fan (preferably to the opposite way of the blades). If the things are coming at something you love, take a stand. Let nothing stand in the way of the things you love. Wether it be your lovely daughter, or a 1up mushroom. Go for your Powerstar.

P.S. I do not condone the use of 1up mushrooms or shrooms of any kind. I had my time with them, and a few were very rough. But thats another story...

Tests!!

I'm tired. No. More. Tests! Must. Have. Time. For. Self. And Family! Must. Resist. Exploding. Brain!

How to be a manager part 2

The second thing that evidently is key to becoming a manager to a multimillion dollar company is the Irish Shower. Let me digress for a second and say I love the Irish and believe them not to be smelly in anyway, but sayings are sayings and they save time.
I was sitting in class waiting to observe the Borg in class when a young, very hip dressed, and slightly sagging guy comes in and sits next to me. The smell of cheep "insert rip off fragrance here" wafers in with him. Class starts and I decide to stick it out. It will dissipate. I will get used to it. NO! Nearing the half way break it starts to burn my eyes. When class breaks I get up and move out to the hall, for fresh air I literally feel sick.
I stand in the hall and hope that his grandmother dies so he will leave. Horrible, but so was the smell. As I come back in I notice that he is sitting in the same place never getting up. The smell is getting stronger. It doesn't have any underling BO smell, like he was covering up not getting into the shower, he just thinks that its a good idea. Maybe its covering up the smell of stupidity.
As I go back to my seat I know that I have to make a decision. Do I move, or not? As I near my seat the smell hits like a brick wall surrounding him at about four feet.
I have to move.
As I pick up my stuff the kid looks at me questioningly. "Suns in my eyes. Moving back a little."
He nods knowingly.
Success! I move two seats back to were it just smells like the outside of a JC Penny Mall entrance. Annoying but tolerable.
The smelly starts to shift uncomfortably. I stare, whats wrong, whats he doing. He gets up and moves two seats back to sit next to me again.
"Sun was bothering me too." He says smiling.
I'm stuck dumb. The smell is back and worse. Its spreading around the classroom like the Andromeda Strain. I get up and pick up my stuff and prepare to leave. He looks again questioningly. "Got go. Grandmother died." I say with a shrug, and escape.

Unplugged

As I sit in my Principles of Management class, I look over the "perspective" leaders of business, and I think of crying. I wouldn't trust the majority of these people to manage a Burger King. No less then five of them have a bluetooth headset stuck in their ear. Every week, two times a week when I see them and they have them in their ear. Outfits change but bluetooth is the same. I wonder when do they put them in? When they wake up, after they brush their teeth, or right when they leave the house: keys, walet, headset. Do they take them off to shit?
What important part of this universe are they a part of. They are obvously so important that the thought they might not be able to talk on there cell and perform complicated "hands free" activities at any give moment is unfathable. Maybe their on the bomb squad, or contected to the presedent of their given job. I'm going with, they feel so self important that they think they need to be conected. Unplug for a fucking secound. Give the teacher respect.
But I know whats really going on. It's the Borg. Star Trek was right. There is a species from the far reaches of space that endlessly soak up planets and assimilate them into one mind. They are attacking us before we even know it. Inserting this implants into our ears, never unpluged. There not going to get me. I will not be a part of this colective masses, I will be independent and not act like my ear is an extention of the constantly conected world of technology.
Now excuse me I have to download the new John Mellencamp record to my IPod.

What its like?

Writing is like being a bad kisser. You keep wanting to do it, but always worried about the results.